Lately life has been ROUGH. That’s all caps and bold because there’s no other way I can quite describe it. I am in my final 5 weeks down to completing my Master’s program in addition to moving an hour away from my current job and internship. Every day I am at my internship site for a few hours then I work an 8 hour shift, and drive an hour home. I get home at 12am -ish and then go to sleep for a few hours, just to get up and do it all again. Oh and just not forget the fact that I just recovered from a chronic sinus infection that 3 rounds of antibiotics could not kill. I’ve spend 3 months of coughing incessantly with no to no sleep until 2 weeks again when I finally saw an Allergist and she prescribed me a steroid and antibiotics, which cleared me up QUICK. To say that I have been struggling these last 3 weeks is an understatement. I have spend many days and nights crying to myself, my therapist, my partner, and really anyone who pretends to want to listen. Honestly, I wish I had the affordability to quit work and focus entirely on graduating but that’s just not the reality I live in.
Whenever I struggle in life I tend to block the world from seeing this side of me. It’s like I have to maintain this certain image of myself to the world. I always have to be positive and hopeful; the carrier of light for others, but again, this is not the reality in which I live in. Shit is real, no one can always be positive and uplifting all the time and there’s no fucking shame in that. I STRUGGLE and I lost my HAPPINESS in the mist of trying to do everything I’m suppose to be doing. I lost sight of what happiness means for me. Spirituality and nature makes me happy but honestly I’ve been too exhausted to do anything close to these two things. Does this make me weak or less than the image you’ve created for me?
Learning to stay fully in the present is hard within chaos, but it’s doable. 5 weeks isn’t too far away and when I choose to stay in this moment I alleviate the thrills of anxiety, discouragement, and a place of swallowed darkness. I’m not always the uplifting spiritual teacher/ mentor but I’ll always be the realest spiritual teacher/mentor because at the end of each day I am a Spirit living a human existence. Forgive me for I shall not lie or pretend to be someone I’m not; I’m just Amber Choisella.
It felt amazing. I had my first healing session of Reiki today and I have to admit I did not anticipate on feeling so tired afterwards, honestly. So before I tell you the after effects let me tell you the story first.
I am training as a counselor here in Sacramento, CA and the site that I’m with, my supervisor happens to be a Reiki Master. This is a fact that I have recently just found out, but it’s another colleague of mine who performed reiki today. She rents a room in the office to perform Reiki for clients (outside of the mental health counseling field). I asked for a session since she will also be training me as well. She is a Reiki Master too. It’s so interesting that this is the route I’m going now, because it appears it’s what’s surrounding me right now. Ok ok, now the session…
I had an hour session. She asked what areas I wanted more attention on and I told her to focus more on my throat and sacral areas. I asked for my ancestors, loved ones, and Guardian Angels to come in and assist as well. I started to feel the energy as soon as she started. Once she made it to my lower chakras I immediately felt the strong urge to urinate, as if I had been holding it forever so we took a break and I ran to the bathroom to relieve my bladder and the released energy my body was no longer holding onto. I went back into the room and when we started up again, I felt a strong chill from the top of my head straight down to the bottom of my feet, multiple times. Following this sensation I felt the presence of other healers working on me as well, I felt that they were ancestral, but that was all the information I received. I didn’t question it, I just accepted the flow and everything that was happening within and beside me. I also had a flashback to a past life of when I was in Ancient Egypt. I was looking up at a wall made out of gold. I did not see any hieroglyphics but it felt familiar and then I was back in the present moment. When she was done with the healing she informed me that she too picked up some past life stuff relating to my sacral chakra and felt the energy of my ancestors as well during the healing session.
As I said before, this was an amazing experience. Which leads me to my previous question, how am I going to be trained for energy healing if I’ve never experienced it, that’s not honest, in my eyes. I am so excited and on board with this journey that I’m embarking upon consistently. I have started my E-book, The 5 Keys to Becoming Spiritually Confident, so please be on the lookout for it very soon!
Love and Light my Friends!
There is no real separation among mankind besides the separation we create around us. The chaos, the loss of blood is from us to us. This is the time to awaken and unite to raise consciousness. Pray for Humanity, for praying brings an abundance of healing and forgive man for man knows not what he does.
Hey everyone! It’s been a lllooooongg time since I’ve written anything but I’ve been busy creating my new business, The Free Spirited Spiritual Development and Coaching Program!!! Spirit told me that I was ready to go after the eclipse and I’ve hit the ground running ever since!!!
I have to say honestly, it’s been a sort of chain reaction type of event ever since the last psychic show I worked for. It was in June of this year when I met another vendor by the name of Michelle P. She asked for my business card and ended up calling me a week after the event. She asked if I had a mentor or a coach working with me and then she gave me a few names in my area that she knew who could help me build my business, this was the starting point! I contacted a woman named Katrina S who lived in the Sacramento area and I didn’t hear back from her for about a month. When she finally contacted me I forgot why I had reached out to her but I really liked her vibe. She apologized for not seeing my message sooner due to the fact that the message went to her spam folder unexpectedly. Divine timing if you ask me, because I was ready.
Had I not met Katrina I would know nothing about the huge benefits of networking, redesigning my website, the importance of email opt-in’s, and how to even develop a business and marketing plan! There’s a lot to learn when creating a business but then again I am my brand so it’s salient to get out into the community and meet referral sources, possible joint venture opportunities, and CLIENTS!
In offering a free psychic reading I bring forth the interest and it’s always exciting for me to bring forth information that I’m picking up from the sitter’s energy and from Spirit, but the working to transform, that’s where the most excitement lies for me! Teaching others about their spiritual origins and reminding their spirit of who they really are and what they are capable of is soooo fulfilling! I want to travel the country and the world educating and sharing with others; that will be my greatest desire with this business! Here’s to manifesting GREATNESS!!!
Everyday, I think about her everyday but when I woke up this morning my soul wept. It wept because it reminded this was the date that she made her transition, a year ago. We communicate with one another daily but it doesn’t change the fact she is no longer in this 3D form of existence.
A few days ago she told me that I need to go to church because I had been contemplating going on a solo hike, she insisted that I go to church instead, so I did. I was late but I got to service before it ended. Reverend was giving spirit greetings and within 5 minutes Spirit directed her to me. She immediately brought in my Grandmother and I just wept loudly. No one in service knew what today meant, no one. I’m not surprised either. As soon as I stepped into the church my vibrational frequency changed from a lower level to a higher loving level.
I spoke to the Reverend after church and she advised me to grab a white candle to acknowledge her day before going into a deep meditation. I brought the candle and have it lit next to her photo. I’m in bed now because grieving is exhausting but I’ll be okay. Her Spirit has never left me just her body, yet a part of me will always grieve her passing. Her Spirit is always with me but I’m still human.
I never thought this would be the last night I would spend with Babe on this 3D existence of life. Originally I had planned on spending the night along with my twin sister because now that Babe was on hospice we wanted to spend as much time with her that we could. Before arriving to the hospital I called the nurse’s station and requested for any extra pull out chair so that we both could spend the night but when I entered into the room there was only one. So I did what I always done I took a seat right next to Babe.
She was unconscious at this point but she looked like she was sleeping peacefully even sounded like she was snoring, but that sound was actually a sign of actively dying, which I found out later. I brought a Sylvie Brown book on life in the afterlife and started reading it to her. The photo below is a picture that my sister took while I was reading to her. It doesn’t look like it but Babe is laying in the bed comfortably underneath her blanket. It wasn’t an emotionally hard night for me surprisingly, we had been with her every night since we found out this would be her last stay in the hospital.
This was a Friday night however this began the following Thursday night. I had been pet sitting for my sister’s best friend and was waiting a long time to take the dog back to her parent’s house because my sister and I were flying up to Portland, OR to attend our cousin’s graduation from college. I ended up visiting my grandmother at 8:30pm. When I entered into the room I instantly knew something was wrong, very wrong. She didn’t look like herself and when I touched her she was clammy. She said her stomach hurt which wasn’t unusual but when she asked for a Kleenex to spit up in she threw up dark brown fluid, which was bile. I called for the CNA’s to help clean her up and in that very moment I experienced tunnel vision with Babe. Our soul’s communicated and she told me, “I’m done”, and I immediately started to cry. I heard her in my mind if that makes sense, and I knew then it was the beginning of the end of this journey for her and I both.
Around 12:30am on the 19th I decided to leave and go home. I got up out of my seat and came around the bed and held her bruised hand, and with my other free hand I wipe something from her face and kissed her on her forehead and said, “Ok Babe I’ll see you tomorrow when I spend the night”. I said goodnight to my sister and said “I love you Babe” and immediately I heard in my head, “I love you too”. I verbally recognized this my sister and told her that her spirit was still with her.
Three and a half hours later I received a call from my mother saying, “She’s gone, Mama’s gone”, the day my entire life changed.
Last night my sister and I traveled to San Francisco to attend a concert. Normally from Sacramento it’s takes an hour and a 1/2 but since we left at 5:30pm, we were expecting to get there in 2 and 1/2 hours because of rush hour traffic, but we were wrong. An hour later we entered into the city where we met the most of our traffic. I have an exteme anxiety of driving in SF due to the high hills so I prayed for comfort as I exited off of the 101. Next, I asked my guides specifically to help me find close and FREE parking and I found both minutes later.
Hazel English is a 25 year old Oakland based Australian Indie artist. I found her one day last year while listening to an Indie mix on Spotify. If you’re into the Indie genre check her out, you’ll love her! She’s got a 60’s vibe about her from the clothing she wears you the essence she sends out onto the world.
My sister and I were originally the first pair in line but after going back to the car and grabbing my sister’s sweater we came back second in line. The two ladies in front of us were San Jose natives who extended warmness and familiarity. As soon as the doors were opened we walked into the venue and Hazel walks in front and a across from where I’m standing in the darkened lit room and I yell, “Hazel” as she turns around. I then embarrassingly ask, “Can I take a picture with you”, which she replies, “Sure but after the show”. I felt like a little kid and I knew my face was red from the embarrassment I felt. Here I am 28 years old, geeking out when I see another (talented) human being just feet from where I was standing. All in all she put on an amazing show and displayed some of her era sticken moves which I wished I had recorded on my Snapchat!
Spirit is always with us readily available to assist with anything, all we need to do is ask. Although, I asked for small things, Spirit was there so why wouldn’t there be there when I ask for “big” things?
While you’re pondering that question just go ahead and listen to her, here’s a link from Amazon Music, it’s her new album, Just Give In/ Never Going Home Again. You’re thank you in advance!
Another late night post when I get off work an have time before I go to sleep to refocus my mind on light work “stuff”. I’ve been working on releasing a lot of things, that no longer serve me, things that limit me, and things that are not for the highest good. I’m an Indigo. I came here to help the world become enlightened and remember why they too chose come to Earth.
Each of us has a purpose and a reason everything that happens in life is for our highest good for us to learn, is it (learning) not for the highest good? That sounds redundant but it’s true. I work well with people it’s like a natural ability that’s where counseling comes in for me. And spiritually I connect with people because I can pick up on energy and and connect with Spirit through my mediumship.
Development is ever going it doesn’t stop it’s not like I get to a level where I feel like I’ve learned all that I need to learn and I don’t need to learn anymore. That’s Ego, which can be very hard to defeat but it’s not really my ego that affects me it’s my belief in myself sometimes honestly, but I’m a work in progress. We’re all a work in progress.
I am. I am. I am that I am.
As my solar plexus shines……..