Hey guys sorry it’s been a while since my last post I’ve been dealing with issues that I’m now ready to talk about…..
“The ego is not master in its own house.”
“The poor ego has a still harder time of it; it has to serve three harsh masters, and it has to do its best to reconcile the claims and demands of all three…The three tyrants are the external world, the superego, and the id.”
“Where id is, there shall ego be.”
Yep, the EGO itself is a tough one to break through. It’s the mind outward identity….look this is who I want the world to acknowledge me as, identity. This could be consisted of multiple things but mine ultimately lies within my image. To be more specific, my physical image.
Above there is a picture of my name necklace. It spells out in gold, A. Choisella, A for Amber and then my middle name, which is my favorite name because of it’s uniqueness… anyhow…. I’m been struggling with finding an image that world will recognize and accept me by, yet beauty is the only trait I’ve known. I’ve always been known and referred to as “the pretty girl” and yeah it sounds nice and all but after 27 years of hearing it all the time, I’ve always wondered the genuinity of the word. I don’t want to be known by my physicalities but rather my true and inner beauty, you know by what the stars are made from….
I always listen to Spirit and I have learned when its Spirit and when its Ego speaking to me. The breaking of my necklace was a clear indicator that I am being advised to move away from the Ego. The first time the chain broke was January 24th, this yearj two days before my birthday. I went and got it fixed, feeling like it was a necessity to have, yet now since it’s happened again, maybe it’s time to not get it fix and put it away for a while as I continue working on my Ego. Spirit speaks and I listen. Listening to your higher self or from Spirit will never lead you wrong.
Do you represent what you preach, or are you a walking hypocrite hoping to fill in the shoes of your favorite author or person you see on tv? What is it about your persona that drives people in your direction and does your passion always shine through?
These are questions I ask myself in attempting to display my many messages to society. Displaying confidence in what you are speaking out about is key for society to resonate with you. As I write this I am being reminded of this as well. I struggle with confidence from time to time, hey I’m human it happens! Yet, I’m honest about it, because I’m no where close to being perfect. What’s perfect anyways?
Studying and experiencing, it’s what I do. In order to be of help for others I need to know what I’m talking about. I need to understand how it feels, I know it’s the Empath in me, but all and all I need to be able to be in the expert of my image. Last night my younger cousin reached out to me because of the experiences she’s been having. She’s actually the reason I am writing this. She’s experiencing mediumship abilities which is AWESOME! She knows that I have such experiences and knowledge so I can help explain some things to her. My image is what she saw and my image allowed her to reach out to me. I want to be someone that anyone can reach to.
I am that someone.
I possess the knowledge, and I can assist others spiritually, emotionally, and metaphysically.
I have the experience and I have the knowledge. Just like you, I too can do anything I put my mind and energy into.
Disclaimer: I found this picture on my Pinterest and felt it matched this post so perfectly!
And I’ve always felt different I never felt like I have a really belonged anywhere so I’ve always been within myself.Yet it hasn’t really been a problem until I start to speak my truth, my beliefs then I’m attacked or so it seems.
I don’t know, all I see is people killing people, humans killing humans and for what exactly?
Color, religion, sexual orientation, money ? It’s all wrong so wrong. And at the end of the day who wins? No one.
All this division all the separation for what, no real concrete reason? It’s just back and forth and back and forth no real solution no real resolution we must come together it’s the only conclusion.
Anger fuels anger when is it going to stop we’re killing each other,
we’re killing the World.
When will the World fully wake up and realize this? All the answers live within our God-Consciousness. I pray for the world, I send healing energy to the World for its people because I know one day they’ll come to see, they’ll come to see.
I am ecstatic to announce my collaboration with BayArt, another influential conscious and aware blog site! I was approached by the sites’ creator to join the team, based upon what I write here on thefreespirited! If you follow my work please feel free to visit BayArt to check out the site and to follow my contributions there as well!
Vancouver never forgot about me and I shall never forget the city that hwy 5 runs up north to. Spirit told me months prior that I would be going to Vancouver and for awhile I fought against it but what’s meant to be will always be. I flew out of Sacramento into Seattle not knowing how this trip would turn out and I didn’t let it worry me. I arrived in Seattle and settled in my room. In the middle of the night I heard my name, loud, clear, and speaking with a feminine tone. I woke up confused because I was the only person in my room, yet I felt protected because I knew Spirit was with me. In the morning I got my things together got on the shuttle back to SeaTac (airport) to get my rental car and head north to Vancouver. Driving up I decided to listen to Esperanza Spalding because her music spoke to me at this moment in my life. Jazz hits me that way. She plays a role in my memory for this particular day. Yes, I spent a day, rather a few hours in Vancouver itself but nonetheless it was the journey that made everything what it was.
Passing the border seem to take forever and the officers are never “nice”. Once I was officially on Canadian soil I went and exchanged some money and then headed to the University of British Columbia where I had planned on spending my time. I had researched and saw a garden on campus and felt drawn there. Upon my first exit entering into the city I drove past a pillar that read, “The meaning of life is Love”, and I checked in my rear view mirror to make sure it was clear, it was, so I reversed and took a picture, which is above, knowing that this was a sign of synchronicity that I was on the right path.
Not realizing the garden I was going to ended up being a Japanese Zen Garden I fell in love with the serenity of the garden. It was then I put on my IPod and began listening to Espe when the song Apple Blossom feat Milton Nascimento came on and I found myself sitting in the gazebo in a meditation. There I was, a foreigner, alone, and unbothered, meditating in a gazebo listening to Esperanza Spalding, just living in the moment….
So I know you’re wondering, what is it that I found in British Columbia, well I’ll tell you…. I learned to rely on and trust in Spirit. Trust in the process of how this thing called life and development works. After my time spent in Vancouver I drove 5 hours south down to Portland, Oregon for my aunt’s 50th birthday party and there I met one of my soul mates. I noticed him and he noticed me but time later told us that we rejoined each other for lessons learned. I helped him through defeating an addiction and he helped me believe further into faith when he was diagnosed with testicular cancer. He currently has 2 more chemo treatments to go and he’s been ever so positive throughout the entire process. And to think I would have never known him unless I had ventured out into British Columbia.
Amber Choisella 💖
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